1. Do you jam out on your kid's best friend TWICE in a row because your kid is behaving like a doofus???
Last week Eva was being rotten BEYOND WEEK-OLD COMPOST IN THE HEAT OF SUMMER. As a result, we wound up cancelling a "playdate" with her friend Emie.
Eva cried, Emie cried, and Etienne and I felt waves of guilt wash over our coal black hearts, because Eva's punishment had an impact on her sweet little friend. But hey, collateral damage, right? Lessons must be taught here.
Anyway, this week Emie was over at our house. For "fun", I painted their faces...painstakingly drawing matching flowers, butterflies, and hearts on their cheeks and foreheads (believe me, this stretched the limits of my artistic capability and it STILL looked like they had been painted on by a blind person suffering a seizure).
Then, horror of horrors.
Eva smudged her butterfly. Ever so slightly.
And you'd have thought the freaking APOCALYPSE had arrived.
Tears, foot-stomping, the whole bit.
"EMIE IS PRETTIER THAN MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!"
Of course we told her to suck it up and whispered threats to send Emie home. But my heart just wasn't in that response, because Emie's big brown eyes were looking at me and I just couldn't stand bombing her playdate twice in a row.
So Emie wound up staying.
And once again, I wound up second-guessing my parenting skills.
Sometimes I feel like such a SUCKAH.
2. Addie ate Chinese food for the first time tonight. A child who often refuses to eat ANYTHING sat there and double-fisted lemon chicken and shrimp fried rice so fast, it was like watching a freaking hummingbird attack the plate. I was afraid to get my hands near her mouth.
Her fortune cookie read: "You are next in line for promotion in your firm"
She ate the cookie while whirling like a dervish to Les Cowboys Fringants' Manifestation song.
Eva's said, "Time is the wisest counsellor".
Good. Because Mom clearly isn't.
3. Eva says my friend Louise lives outside of Regina...so it's not Saskatchewan. Kid can find 40 countries on a globe, but doesn't know that a FARM near REGINA is still SASKATCHEWAN.
4. Etienne was talking tonight about a conversation with his manager (who is female).
Eva (shocked): "Your boss is a GIRL?"
(at this point, I quietly began choking on my stir fried vegetables)
Etienne: "Yes, she is"
Eva: "WHAT, ARE YOU CRAZY, THEN?"
It's been a long night.
Like a waterfall in slow motion, Part One
3 years ago
3 comments:
haha...collateral damage, yes, I've suffered from exactly the same guilt. What to DO? Something creative....hmmm....how about excusing yourselves to the bathroom where you say, "At this point, you've earned three disgusting household chores as soon as friend leaves. Would you like to make it four?"...smiling, because friend can feel emotive stress emanating from the bathroom...or....next day faking phone call from friend's mom to invite her over and saying loudly into the receiver, "sorry, the troll cannot come over - she misbehaved yesterday with friend (cite specifics), and has earned one stay-home-from-play-date." no harm to friend, agony for the troll, but short-lived...friend can come over for shorter visit next time with you smiling benignly over angel troll's perfect behavior...ahhh, just brainstorming - GOOD LUCK!
My friend lent me a copy of a book called "Dare to Discipline" being I've never been a parent and am generally really lax with kids. Anyway, the book is pretty good. Here's an excerpt page:
http://www.amazon.com/gp/reader/0842305068/ref=sib_dp_pt#reader-link
Wow - that's two now. Your Eva and Brenda's Noah both thought that "girls can't be bosses" - and you're both professionals! Crap. Crap. Crap.
I guess that's what we get when we elect male politicians then put them in the limelight as our leaders.
At least your kids have role models who can set the record straight - poor kids who don't!
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